On Friday I took the initiative and got my hair cut before Piny left on vacation. When I walked in he said, "are you here alone?" and I told him Vizhier was coming to meet me. He look relieved. He said that he wouldn't shave my head if I was alone...that's when I discussed my theory to just take what he needed to do a medium length "halo" and let me keep a pixie cut until it really does start to fall out. That solves two issues for me 1) it lets me get use to not having so much hair and 2) when and IF (there's still some hope even it it's only 1%) my hair starts to fall out it will be less dramatic with short hair. He thought it was a great idea and was on board immediately. My hair was so long anyway he should be able to make a couple of halo lines no problem. Below are my before and after photos plus the tray that held the locks that will make the halo... The after photo doesn't do it justice. I actually like it. I was laughing with Vizhier because I turned to look out the door then back at her and my head whipped around much faster than normal without all that heavy hair!! Also I have learned that I have a huge cowlick on my left side that my long hair masked...need to retrain my hair before it falls out in the next two weeks! ;-)
Yesterday I spent half the day driving to and from Idyllwild with my sister and Abby so we could visit our Aunt and Uncle, my cousin and her 1 year old daughter at our Grandma Eva's house. They were visiting from Idaho and I rarely get to see them. My Papa Lucero is in the hospital from chronic obstructive pulmonary disease ("COPD") which they discovered when they thought he had bronchitis (which they thought he caught from his immune system being compromised). That is a result of his more serious diagnosis of Bone Marrow Cancer (Multiple Myeloma). I talked to him two weeks ago and even though he seemed a little out of it he still seemed okay. In the last week he has been in a downward spiral and with the new COPD diagnosis he can't even return to their cabin (he needs oxygen therapy which they can't do in the high altitude). I feel bad for my Grandma and I hope he gets better soon.
That LA Times article really got me thinking about long term survival which I wasn't really contemplating (just am not ready to go there). Breast cancer is treatable and there are many long term survivors so I envisioned having a really shitty year while I fight this off and then planned to spend many years as an improved version of me with a healthy vegan diet and new breasts and hair...but I don't like to hear that 74% of women were "still alive" after five years. WTF. I see Dr. Funk Wednesday and will ask to get a copy of the full report. There must be some confounding factors.
- "Five years after their diagnosis, almost 74% of the women diagnosed with breast cancer during pregnancy were still alive. Among their sisters who were not pregnant when they got treatment, 55.75% survived to the five-year mark. The researchers found some evidence that the pregnant breast cancer patients fared better on long-term survival, as well. But those findings were less clear than the difference in five-year survival. "
The other thing I keep thinking about is how I really need to analyze and understand my treatment. I feel like I (and all my doctors) just wanted to get started killing this tumor that I didn't have time to do much research. Here is an outline of my treatment plan
- My Chemo Cocktail
- FEC-100
- Cytoxan (Cyclophosphamide)
- Epirubicin
- 5-FU (Fluorouacil)
- Integrative Oncology
- Acupuncture
- Chinese Herbs
- Healthy Diet
- Baby Boy Berman Birth (huge smile)
- Battery of tests, scans, MRIs, etc.
- Surgery
- Lumpectomy vs. Mastectomy
- Reconstructive vs. Reduction
- Radiation
- Possible Proton Therapy?
- Adjuvant Therapy
- Tomaxafin (anti-estrogen drug)
- What are the long term side effects?
- Infertility?
- Menopause?
I also want to keep reading the "Life Over Cancer" book that Sharon gave me. Similar to my treatment it is all about integrative oncology and supplemental approaches.
So tired. My CBC tests show that I am doing well but she anticipated that Friday, yesterday and today would be a bigger drop in my counts so I needed to take it easy. That was kind of hard to do this weekend. I feel okay, just really tired most of the time. A bit sluggish. I'm trying to keep charging ahead anyway though. And no, I'm not trying to be too much of a hero. Don't worry. My throat is a little sore right now so I'll keep doing my baking soda/salt rinse and hope that does it. Nighty-night and don't let the bed bugs bite.
Hi Jessica,
ReplyDeleteI got your blog info from Sharon who told me that you were a new recruit to our exclusive club. She might have already given you my info, but in case she hasn't, please feel free to check out www.baldfatandcrazy.com for my story. I have been where you are and am now on the other side of it. Hang in there, girlfriend!