A fun word game for mothers of toddlers. These are phrases I only THINK in my head but do not dare say out loud for fear I get arrested or called about to child protective services...
Thought: "It stinks like ____ in this ____ room. Did you _____ in your ____ diaper or what??!?"
Actually: "Ohhh, do you have poo poo in your diaper sweetie? Can mommy change it?"
Thought: "No I will not ____ rock you one more ____ second. Now go the _____ to sleep already!"
Actually: "Five more minutes of rocking baby, and THAT'S it..."
Thought: "Did you just _____ pinch my leg? You little _____, you just pinched my ______ leg!"
Actually: "Honey, what's the rule about our hands? They are for clapping and saying "hi", right?"
Thought: "OMG, I want to vomit in my mouth, this is the biggest, most disgusting, rancid, foul, horrific _____ diarrhea diaper I have ever changed in my life!"
Actually: "Oh no, let's put on some extra desitin, your poo poo is giving you a rash!"
Thought: "When will this day ever _____ end?! It's only 2:30..."
Actually: "Okay, who wants to watch a movie and have popcorn while mommy rests?"
Thought: "Is she refusing the take her ____ nap? Oh ___! What the ____ am I going to do now?!?"
Actually: "Sweetie, we'll get to go to the park after your nap. If you don't take one we can't go."
In other, less hysterical, news, I got the Zomeda infusion Friday (ugh, HATED it since I had to have an IV and sit there in the Chemo chair just like in the "old" days as a full-on cancer patient except this time I was ALONE waiting for the time to pass and trying desperately not to go to those dark thoughts I used to have sitting in those chairs not too long ago). Well, the drug knocked me on my ____. I had flu like shivering and bone sensitivity for two days straight and all I could do was sleep (this meant a boring weekend). Today I'm feeling a bit better but it was really annoying. Lupron (the estrogen suppressor) causes bone loss and eventually osteoperosis. So to counteract that I got a shot of Zomeda which helps maintain bone density. That makes my drugs total 1) Lupron; 2) Xeloda (low-dose Chemo pills of 5-FU); 3) Lexapro; 4) Trazedone and now 5) Zomeda (once every six months while on Lupron). Plus in SIX months when I am done with the Xeloda (oh yeah, found that out Friday and I am sincerely depressed about the length but what can I do if the pills can help save my life?) I have to go on Tamoxifen.
I am seriously thinking about whether or not to just go ahead and have a full hysterectomy. NOT TAKING THAT LIGHTLY. We already know that Dr. McAndrew basically said no more pregnancies for me. It is so incredibly difficult when someone tells you NO even if you had come to the conclusion already on your own. Taking away an option is never fun unless you can rule it out on your own. Now you see, if I do the procedure then I am permanently in menopause BUT I can't do hormone replacement therapy. I'll write more on this another time when my teeth don't hurt from this _____ stupid Zomeda infusion. Oh and my ____ back is killing me. I don't know if that is from sleeping wrong the whole weekend on my bed or from the ____ infusion. Just _____ lovely.
No comments:
Post a Comment